King'z Jewel

I hav a confession to make. I have been mad with God. He sent me a message in answer to something that I had been praying fervently and it was definitely not the answer I expected. Do I expect God to just fill my wishes like some short order cook? No, but I did believe that God had heard my cry and inclined His ear to me. I really thought that He had sided with me in this very important matter, but He did not. It was a serious shock to me. I think it was even worse than the time we got demonically oppressed due to us being in the wrong place at the wrong time. I said some things that I shouldn’t ever say to God… but I believe that since He created me, He knew what I would say before I said it. He knew I would feel remorse for it and repent. He knew that it would be hard for me to stifle my thoughts and feelings. He knew I needed time to get over His decision and let God be God. He knew that before He formed me in my mother’s womb (Jeremiah 1:5)! Nothing I say or do is a surprise to God.

I know He is still with me, helping me along…even after the horrible things I said and thought. I tried really hard to make the thoughts disperse, but this thing is so important to me that I could not just let it go. I have to continue to remind myself that everything has a reason and a time (Ecclesiastes 3:1). I have to remember that God does things for the GOOD of those who love Him (Romans 8:28). I have to remember that He wants to prosper me and give me a good life (Jeremiah 29:11). I have to remind myself of these things, even with the impending trial I am facing…even in the situation we are in now.

I know that God has forgiven me as he did Peter when he denied Jesus 3 times after the crucifixion (John 18:25-27), for just as Jesus knew Peter would deny him (Mark 13:29-31), He also knew that I would get angry. I know that now I just have to forgive myself and accept God’s call on my whole life, not just the parts that I am willing to hand over. This is all about giving Him the control to do WHATEVER He wants in my life, not just what I want Him to do. It’s not easy. In order for us to carry our cross, we must drop everything and follow Him, even unto the end of the age.

We have done the fast for 2 weeks with a week of rest in between. It was an exhilarating time of worship and prayer. We have also learned what we can and cannot live without. It has brought about some life changes. Living without caffeine is not as hard as I thought it would be…as I have had no withdrawal symptoms at all. We have been able to cut out all high fructose corn syrup and we feel phenomenal. We even have our son on a sugar fast this week to see if it changes his life in any way. He is still just as hyper energetic as always, but even moreso. He has fallen in love with the crunch and natural sweetness of the raw carrot, and has been eating them as if they are going out of style. The husband has learned that he doesn’t NEED meat in his diet to be happy, although having it once in a while is still something he would want to do. I have been having a BALL trying out all these new ideas and recipes that I either come across or think up on my own. Our favorite so far is sweet potato pancakes with honey as the syrup. I know that some of the Daniel Fast purists would rather leave out the honey, but for our purposes it works rather well. We modified certain things on the fast to accommodate things like my husband’s need for more protein than soy. The best part about the fast is that you can modify certain elements and still give all the glory to God. Not having a heap of animal products in our diet *as we only allowed tuna or chicken once a day for him and 2-3 times a week for myself* has really changed our bodies. Our systems have been more purified than ever. Our minds and hearts are clearer. We are a better family because of this experience. Our son has fasted with us, but he always gets to choose what. He has seen better results in his own body, too. We are all more rested and not fatigued. We are all very much content as opposed to having bouts of depression. We also cut out most secular television as part of our ongoing fast so we start the day with Godly programming and end it with Godly programming. It’s amazing. I suggest the Daniel Fast for anyone who really wants to purify their lives.

I have officially been part of the Presidential Prayer Team since at least 2001. No matter who is President, he and all the people in power need prayer. I am happy that I can pray for President Barack Obama. You can join, too. There is a special call to pray till Inauguration Day for our new president. They calculate another 75 days to pray for that. I have been praying his and his family’s safety since this all began.

Very soon, I will be undertaking something that God has been speaking to me about for a while. I will be making a prayer shawl. I tried to use the blanket that my grandmother gave me, and that was sufficient for a while, but now I am being called to make my own special shawl specifically for prayer. If you look up the history and meaning behind prayer shawls, you will see that they have been significant throughout history, especially in Judaism. It is considered a way to create a sacred place to pray. There is a lot of information about the original prayer shawls and how they have evolved to become universally used by many people today. I don’t know exactly when I will find the material that God wants me to use, but I know that this shawl will be dang awesome when it’s done.

My mother in law is in the hospital right now getting surgery on her stomach. Something ruptured. Don’t know much else, but please pray. I will let you know more when I can. Thank you all and God bless!!!

When it comes to things about my son, people tend to think that when I get a burden to pray for his safety or something like that, that I am just paranoid.

This morning, I happily dropped off my son at camp with a kiss and a prayer for his safety. It’s what I do every time he goes somewhere. Two days he has been in camp and I have done the same thing. Today… well today ended up being different. I did my usual kiss and a prayer thing, then went about my merry little way.

I decided to go do some shopping for me, so I headed off to the dollar store and Walmart without another thought. On my way back, I stopped off for gas. I have to drive past the Y to get home, but about 20 feet after I passed it I get this heaving burden to pray for SAFETY. All I can hear is the word repeated SAFETY and a picture of the bus *which I did NOT see this morning* in my head. I could barely drive home, the burden was so heavy. I had to get other people to pray with me for safety of the kids on the bus and the leaders, too. It wasn’t a specific OMG something about my kid prayer. It was about the bus full of people. The burden lasted a good half hour till whatever danger passed over them.

I have no doubt that they will return at 3:15 pm unscathed and happy, but you better believe that it’s due to the prayers of the righteous who stood in the gap and answered the call to pray this morning.

Elder’s Meditation of the Day – July 13

“Grandfather, Great Spirit, once more behold me on earth and lean to hear my feeble voice. You lived first, and You are older than all need, older than all prayer…You are the life of all things.”
–Black Elk, OGLALA SIOUX

Great Spirit – Sometimes I don’t feel like praying. Sometimes when I have done something wrong, I’m ashamed to come to You. Even though You have always been there for me, I sometimes choose to stay away. It’s hard for me to understand what all knowing is. Sometimes it’s hard for me to see how much You really care. But I know if I take a few minutes and think about what I know to be true about You, the things change and I am able to realize Your power and Your love. Today, I’ll start by thinking of You. I’ll think about all the times You have helped and guided me in the past. You are life, You are love, You are power, You are desire, You are truth, You are principle, You are intelligence, You are courage. With You I am everything; without You I am nothing.

Creator, thank You for allowing me to start my day with You.

I have so many things in my mind that conflict with the things that I do and say. I am trying to do things that please God while trying to please my husband and discipline my son. There are hidden things that I don’t talk about with anyone but my husband and God. There are secrets that if found out could do detriment. But they are not my secrets alone. I don’t know how to live holy while I am battling what other people want from me. I don’t know how to stay righteous when people are asking me for unrighteous things. What things are just too much? What is not enough? Where do you draw the line? Where are the boundaries set? I wish I could say more, but I cannot…else I will do harm to others and myself. I just need prayer for guidance more than anything right now I think.

Every time my son asks for healing in his body, God grants him his prayer. Every single time…either within minutes, hours, or a few days. He has prayed healing for his body, my body, and his father on a number of occasions.

He is deathly allergic to milk, but the other day he decided to eat ice cream. He knew what would happen to him if he ate it, but he prayed that God would help him and not let him become sick from his foolishness. He had been rolling all over the floor with stomach pain, but within hours he was completely healed.

I believe it’s because my son, who is only 5, asks for things with complete faith that God will give him what he is seeking. I believe that his unwavering love for God and trust in Him is the truth behind why it is that God shows His love for my son in this way.

There is a huge lesson in faith there, from that 5 year old boy who just gave his heart to God on the 25th of this month. A huge lesson.

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Tags: prayer